A friend of mine told me a story about how her father’s house burned down because of a plumber’s carelessness. According to my friend, during a very cold winter, the pipes in her father’s house froze, so he called a plumber. The plumber came and used a butane torch to thaw out the pipes. The plumber was able to get the water flowing again; so he packed up his tools, got in his truck, and drove away. A few minutes later the house burned to the ground. Apparently the plumber’s blow torch ignited the floor joists near the pipes. No one noticed the smoldering wood until it was too late.
The Bible tells us that we too can accidentally start fires. The Bible says: “Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.”
Our tongue is such a small part of our body; yet it can be deathly destructive. To prevent starting a fire, let me suggest that we learn self-control. When things start to get heated up, turn down the heat. Don’t let your emotions to get out of control and say something you regret. Thomas Jefferson said, “When you’re angry, count to ten before you speak. If very angry, count to a hundred.”
Some people count to ten. Some people walk away. Some people bite their tongue and zip their lips. Sometimes it good to wait until you calm down before you speak. Do whatever it takes to avoid saying something hurtful that lights a spark and starts a fire. Don’t burn down your relationships because you didn’t control your tongue.
Sometimes, it’s not what we say, it’s how we say it. When we yell or raise our voice, we light a spark that may grow into an out-of-control fire.
Don’t use sarcasm. Sarcasm can easily start a fire of bad feelings. Don’t use words like: “You always . . .” or “You never . . .” Saying someone always does something or never does something is bound to hurt feelings and spark a flame of resentment.
Several years ago an elderly pastor gave me some good advice: “Pray every morning that God will help you to watch what you say.” That’s good advice.
When I was a teenager, a friend and I were walking along the road and he was lighting matches and dropping the on the ground. We turned around and saw three small fires in the short grass that grew along the road. We had to run back and stomp out the fires.
If you find yourself having to put out fires—fires that started because of something you said, let me suggest that you seek God’s help. Pray and ask God to help you control your tongue.
We have to talk, but when we talk, we let’s be careful not to start fires. Don’t say things that will cut, hurt, or tear someone down. Say things that will help and not hurt.
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