I’m glad you joined us for this latest episode of the Attic Fables Podcast. Right now, the entire world is in the midst of the coronavirus pandemic. My purpose for today’s story is to give you some comedic relief to the stress we’re all going through.
I used to be a Security Police in the U.S. Air Force. I carried an M16 automatic rifle and 120 rounds of ammo every day at work. My job as a Security Police (SP) was to guard bombs, missiles, aircraft, and other military resources. I often worked nights, and the long eight-hour nightshifts from 11:00 pm to 7:00 am could get very boring. We weren’t allowed to read or listen to the radio while on duty. We had to keep our eyes open and guard the resources. To make the time go by quicker, sometimes we’d play practical jokes on each other. In fact, it was almost a ritual to play a practical joke on the new guys.
One of my first duty assignments was to guard air vents to an underground facility. No this wasn’t a practical joke; it was a real duty assignment. Exciting stuff, hey? The air vents were high up on a hill. I had to follow a path through the woods and look for a guard shack next to an air vent in the middle of the woods. This post had a reputation for being haunted. On one occasion, an SP canine unit was assigned the post, but he and his dog were chased off the hill. According to the dog handler, he and his dog saw something that spooked the dog, and the dog pulled him back down the hill. Believe it or not, the SP didn’t have to go back up to his post, and that night, the air vents were left unprotected. He wasn’t the only SP who believed they saw something and were too afraid to walk the dark path up the wooded hill and stay in the woods all night by themselves.
Anyway, I walked up the hill following the path that went through the woods. The only light was the dim light from my flashlight, so everything was very dark. I found the small guard shack. It had enough room for a chair. I sat down, placed my two-way radio on the windowsill, leaned my M16 against the wall, and settled in for a long night.
My post was 2-Charlie. Another SP, 2-Delta, was on the other side of the hill. He had taken a different path to get to his post. About midnight, I heard 2-Delta call on the radio: “2-Delta to Control, I think I hear something.”
“Control to 2-Charlie, do you hear anything?”
“Negative, Control. I don’t hear anything,” I replied.
“Control to 2-Charlie, go over to 2-Delta to assist in locating the source of the noise.”
Then the SP at 2-Delta said: “2-Delta to Control, I might shoot 2-Charlie.”
Control responded: “Control to 2-Charlie, stay where you are. 2-Delta, make your way over to 2-Charlie.”
I didn’t think the SP at 2-Delta was serious, and I could hear giggling in the background of Control’s radio, so I kind of knew it was just a prank. In a few minutes, the SP on 2-Delta came over. He started laughing. “You didn’t fool me,” I told him.
“You did great,” he said. “We always try to fool the new guys, but I guess we didn’t fool you.”
Over the years, I heard all kinds of practical jokes and other pranks over the radio. Sometimes I got in on the fun as we tried to prank new guys. All the practical jokes were harmless but were a great source of comedic relief during an otherwise long, boring nightshift.
Right now, many people are home from work because of the Coronavirus. Most of us are being adversely affected by a loss of income, and our family’s daily routines have been disrupted. You may feel overwhelmed. You may be feeling stressed to the breaking point. You may be afraid of what will happen if things don’t get back to normal soon. I’m not suggesting you start playing pranks on people, but I do suggest that you find a way to get emotional relief from the stress.
Let me suggest that you start by limiting the amount of time you listen to the news on the radio or watch on TV. A constant barrage of bad and distressing news will only add to your stress. Secondly, spend time outside in your yard or take a walk around the block. Try to find a pastime, hobby, or other diversions to help you fill your time with something you enjoy. Listen to your favorite music. Get out the cookbook or go through your favorite recipes. Spend time in the kitchen simply cooking and preparing a delicious meal.
Whatever you do, please take time to find a healthy form of comedic relief. The Bible says in Proverbs 17:22, “A cheerful heart is good medicine.” So try to do something to cheer yourself up and then share with your friends what you’re doing to help you cope with the stress.
Just trying to give some comedic relief,
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